New Beginnings

It's a new year. Glad to be done with the holidays, and back to normal life.

And what about "normal" life. What's so comforting about it? Maybe it's the comfort of daily rituals and knowing what to expect. Isn't is funny how we sometimes need that, and sometimes dread it?

I have been working steadily now for over 4 months. It's nice to be able to count on a steady income, and attempt to plan for our future...a future that is shaped in eventual retirement, in having "enough money" and enough energy to do some of the things we really enjoy. Like traveling. Like spending unscheduled time. Like being more creative with our days because the whole day will not be taken up with working, providing, shopping, and scheduling our lives around a routine.

So, I currently embrace the routine. Security has always been important to me. But I also long for that spontaneous, irresponsible urge to chuck it all, and take big risks. Anyone else feel that way?

Well I am working now full-time and it feels good. It is officially a temporary job, so we'll see what happens. It is good to be getting out and working again and making some money.

The garden is going through it's Fall changes, and we are harvesting the rest of the tomatoes, and have high hopes for the broccoli. Hoping to harvest some small bunches soon for a tasty dinner vegetable. The Swiss chard is doing great, and we also have some kale, cabbage, spinach, lettuce, and a terribly small pumpkin about the size of a grape that doesn't have much of a chance.

Today is mom's 89th birthday.We are taking her out tomorrow for dinner, and I will take her shopping for something special that she wants. She has heard from some friends today by phone and mail wishing her a happy birthday.

The colors around here are glorious and bright. All the fall leaves are in the midst of changing. It has been raining pretty heavily, too. The brightly colored leaves are stuck to the pavement and it is a perfect picture of Fall when you walk about the neighborhood and tread on the soaked, orange and red leaves, and get one stuck on your shoe, and bring it home, unknowingly, and take it off your shoe, and then decide to keep it because it is a part of the walk that you don't want to forget.

The glorious end to Summer

Summer is coming to an end and I hate to see it go. It means more than a change in the weather this time around. It means how far have I gotten in my job search, have I persuaded my mom to move to a better home environment, have I got all the things done around the house/yard that I intended to, and just what is important, anyway?!

This year our youngest (Sarah) graduated from HS and is now working PT at a preschool and loves it. Our oldest, Daniel, is going back to school for another round of studying film/video. He has great talents for writing, and needs to get a job.

I have been unemployed for over 9 months and trying to find the "Zen" in all of this. Trying to enjoy the time I have, while using the time I have to it's best potential. This makes for quite a bit of wasted time. But wasted is relative, right?

I need to get healthier. I have been enduring lots of aches and pains, and probably drinking too much wine as a reaction to that. I have achey joints, a chronic ache in my back , and occasional sore knees. But, over time, I have found that yoga really helps to ease those ailments. I am also a big fan of walking a couple miles per day.

Well, the other night we watched the director's cut of the Woodstock Movie, and even tho' I was only 11 in 1969, it took me back, and reminded me of how good it is to acknowledge the sychronicity of life when it happens. We spend so much time multi-tasking and "not" taking vacation, that we miss out completely on what is really happening around us. As Neil Young so eloquently said, "To give a love, you've gotta live a love; to live a love, you've gotta be part of." To be part of you've gotta be present and in the moment. That is what this time has allowed me to barely grasp after so long. After so many years of working, raising kids, worrying, and scrambling around trying to keep up. I need to be in that moment. The rest is nothing important.